Understanding the role I play

Just so you know ahead of time, this entry is a little churchy. But hey, I’m a little churchy so this should be expected, right! :)

Anyway, I have done a lot of thinking this week about my role as a mother...well more of just a parent in general, and what it is that I am supposed to be doing.  Has anyone else ever had that thought?  I feel like its always on my mind, and to be honest I never have an answer!

“What am I supposed to be teaching Tanner right now? Is he developing as he should? What can and can’t he eat again at this age? What words is he supposed to be saying? Do I talk or play with him enough? What if I can’t get him to sleep through the night?, etc.”

(Every mother knows that there are so many more questions than that).

Sometimes I feel like the moment you become a mom you're supposed to have this abundant knowledge of how to raise your kid, like you’re supposed to become this childhood development specialist and know everything there is to teach and understand about your child.  Well, lets be honest. If that is the case, I somehow missed it because then I wouldn’t be calling my mom and using google or youtube every time I had a question. :)

Well this week I was reminded of a very sweet moment from a journal entry from about a year ago,  "Tanner is 5 days old today! It is amazing how much joy this little bundle brings me....I had a special experience tonight as  I was rocking tanner to sleep in his room. He was fighting the sleep  but to calm him down I sang him one of my favorite primary songs, “ I am a child of God”. When I came to the verse, “has given me an earthly home, with parents kind and dear. Lead me guide me walk beside me, help me find the way, teach me all that I must do, to walk with him some day”.  I couldn't even finish the song I was so overwhelmed with the spirit . Those words meant so much more to me than they ever had before...I knew that this little chubby cute and precious baby was brought into my life so I could raise him, and raise him to know, to trust, and to recognize his heavenly parent. "

I am so grateful I wrote that down because it reminded of me that the answer doesn’t come from the early childhood psychology book, youtube, blogs or the baby sites online. The answer to, “what am I supposed to be doing as a mom and parent” comes from the parent of us all: Our Heavenly Father.

Its through His doctrine where we will find the principles and lessons we should be teaching our children. It is through bended knees that we are able to raise our kids. By loving, caring, and making the Lord a priority in our lives and in theirs, we will be able to become all that He knows we can be.

I am very grateful to know that the tools that will help me be a good mother are already present in my life. I don’t have to take a parenting class or spend hours on youtube to know that.

I may only be a mother of one really happy baby, and to most of you you probably think I have it so easy, but being a mom/parent is hard….for anyone, no matter how many kids you have or how old they are. It’s just hard. And although I don’t know everything there is to know about the stages my little Tanner should be at with his learning, I do know though that turning to the one source that knows all, will be a blessing to us both, no matter the circumstance.  

I love that I have been given this opportunity to try and sometimes fail at being a parent. And let’s be honest. We all do a lot of failing, we’re not perfect. But I’m grateful because I know that if we do the things that matter most, even thought we might not ever be perfect, we can become better.

If you have a few minutes, I loved this amazing talk about raising our children in the gospel. You should give it a listen:

https://www.lds.org/general-conference/2014/10/parents-the-prime-gospel-teachers-of-their-children?lang=eng

The start of my conclusion

I am sure many of you who are reading this know me already, but for those who don’t, my name is Noelle Briggs. I am 22 and currently live in Southern California with my two favorite people; my 11 month old son Tanner (probably the cutest baby you have ever seen) and my wonderfully handsome husband, Ryan, who is equally as cute (in a manly way, of course).

A few things you should know about me, I love to be outside; running, napping, reading, and doing absolutely nothing. If it can be done outside I want to do it. (I should clarify, though, that it can’t be under 40 degrees...50 is definitely pushing it!  :) I am not the biggest fan of the cold weather, I would so much rather be sweating than shivering.)

On the other hand I am also perfectly fine with staying in my sweats all day and bumming it out on the couch watching pointless T.V. drama shows. How did I not know about “Downton Abbey”, I am hooked. Also,  “The Bachelor” , it doesn’t matter how many times I tell myself I hate that show... I always get sucked back in.

I like to pretend that I am good at cooking. I used to burn everything I touched ( my family still makes fun of me) but I have come a long way and really find satisfaction when I try a new recipe that actually tastes good...and that I didn’t burn.  ;)

I like to think I am pretty crafty, “To-do” lists are a must, I am LDS and proud of it, I graduated in Health Science from Brigham Young University-Idaho and am still not completely sure what I want to do with it. But for now, I love working from home as a Beachbody Health coach. I enjoy being active and learning more about the human body. I really like  hiking but I am what my husband calls a “high maintenance hiker”--if the view isn’t worth it at the top, then I’m not interested. Lastly, I love food. Sandwiches, anything Mexican, and chocolate chip cookies are my weakness.

I feel like there are many reasons why I wanted to start a blog.  But rather than go into them all here (trust me, we’ll get into them all later), here’s the abbreviated version:

Initially I wanted to make one for the business I run from my home. When I first signed up to be a health coach, I wasn’t sure what to do with it, it kind of just fell in my lap. In a good way! When we moved to CA. in August for my husband’s grad school, we just took out our first loan, and living expenses were way more than we could afford. The sudden realization of knowing that we were in debt, felt heavy and overwhelming.

I remember feeling panicked and immediately started looking for jobs that I could do at night. We needed an income but my husband couldn’t work due to school and I wanted to avoid putting our son in daycare if at all possible (he’s just too cute to spend that much time away from!). To cut the story short, I had put a lot of pressure on myself that I was supposed to put my husband through school, be a supportive happy wife, a present loving mother, and just fulfill all the other areas of life when I felt like I couldn’t even take care of myself (at this point I was still rocking the daily sweat pants and t-shirt, greasy hair, and I still adjusting to the changes from having a baby). I felt very confused and not sure what decisions I needed to make but knew I needed to find a way for me to move forward in my role as a mother, wife and as an individual.

So after 5 months of lots of learning and some very humbling experiences this is my conclusion:

All I want is to be the best version of myself, but to also be the version my Heavenly Father needs me to be. Someone who sees their importance and influence in their role as a mother, wife, and friend. Someone who looks for guidance and direction from her father in heaven.  Someone who is grateful for the body they have but takes care of it with respect, self worth, and smart choices. Some who can laugh and be happy in their current situations, and be able to learn from their weakness and who isn’t afraid to use their strengths.  

So at the end of the day, the point of this blog is for me as a wife, mom, coach, missionary and a friend to share my experiences, failures, victories, and moments of me trying to be the best version of me that I can be. And possibly along the way I can even help a few of you to do the same!

I hope that I can do just that and am excited to continue what I have started to learn.